another year older, another year wiser.

when i was 21, i was asked to be the girl that tila tequila pics on "a shot at love".

but the contract requires to have at least two "hot" or what i call.. "hot tub" scenes with tila.. and while that's tempting at all a) we're only 1 week into j's recovery of my possible bisexuality b) i have an amazing recruitnig career that is REALLY irreplaceable.. it's pretty much top dog, big cahona... and that's something i just can't wager on a nationally broadcast faux hot tub scene, with a chick who's crabs have herpes.

when i was 22 i drove to pdx to audition for real world.. not so much 'cause i cared, but 'cause if it's not on your bucket list, you're not American. now granted i'm not 1st nor 2nd gen, but i'll fake it till i make it.

it went really well for a while there... till the jail escaped prostitute stole my boots, right after she told us that she'd "vagina gleeked" on her bf.

(this incident taught me modesty in oversharing)

regardless, i made the cut and ended up bein the democrat virgin that befriended the bi republican with daddy daughter issues.

after the audition was over, [REAL] bi-sexual and i drove home (both of us lived in seattle unironically) together. we hit a snowstorm and had to shimmy our way into some free food and gas at a gas station.. very literally.

regardless.. this brings me to today. i am 25 and darn near 3 weeks.

i've wised up a lot since then.. and by wised up, i mean i have an audition to teach SAT courses while being good looking, for a new dvd series.

when i went to tell my father about this, i was immediately cut off with a "ARE YOU TELLING ME YOUR TRYING OUT FOR JERSEY SHORE!!!!?"

i can't tell if he's against my flushing my career down the toilet, or my contributing to the demographic he watches.